Talk:Error 405/@comment-27730508-20190224222842

This review was conducted on February 24th, 2019.

(SPOILERS!!)

Grammar/Spelling Errors: So minor it's not worth pointing out and I could easily fix these. No points deducted.

General Story: I, like ScoobaDooba, expected this to be cliche due to the opening paragraph and other cliches (also, partially the title), but as I read on the cliches stopped. You did very well conveying the reactions of characters, which made the story feel like it really happened. The twist with the protagonist's ("you" in the story) girlfriend is one I didn't expect to see in a Roblox Creepypasta. I would expect to see a twist like that in an actual, published book. Congratz!

Some cliches are more distracting than others, such as when the protagonist's computer doesn't turn off when they unplug it. But overall this story is original.

FINAL SCORE: 8.9/10