Talk:The Dark Void/@comment-30144972-20170626122901

Analysis:

Grammar: 6/10 (On the second sentence, it has improper capitalization, you spelled "weird" wrong (twice), and it needs punctuation. In the third sentence of the second paragraph, you repeated "was" twice. Last sentence has the wrong verb tense; it should be "saw" as in "I never saw the game again." Considering this story was short, you would've had easily seen these mistakes if you had proofread it.)

Originality: 7/10 (Don't piggyback on those famous "hackers" of ROBLOX. You don't need them to make a good creepypasta.)

Plot: 7/10 (How did you find the game "The Dark Void"? Why did you even join it in the first place? Why does the protagonist find weird games and play them, and what were those games?)

Empathy: 1/10 (The only emotion you put for the protagonist was "I was sorta scared from it." The rest had barely any emotion at all, which is what this story lacks. A good creepypasta explains how the protagonist is feeling to keep the reader occupied and thrilled.)

Thrill: 1/10 (Repetitive sentences (starting with the word "I"), including overused ROBLOX "hacker" figures, and the lack of emotion and feelings is what made this story boring. Hopefully, you do better on your next one. For now, use this information when writing your next creepypasta.)

FINAL SCORE: 4.4/10